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BigBear57
09-21-2003, 02:22 PM
Y'all get out the hankies, this'n made me cry. LOL


The Redneck Love Poem



Collards is green, my dog's name is Blue
And I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you.
Yore hair is like corn silk a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass, which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales but I luv you anyway.
Yo're as satisfy'n as okry jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff" right out of the can.

You have some'a yore teeth, for which I am proud;
I hold my head high when we're in a crowd.
On special occasions, when you shave under yore arms,
Well, I'm in hawg heaven, and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work, they all want to know,
What I did to deserve such a purdy, young doe.
Like a good roll of duct tape, yo're there fer yore man,
To patch up life's troubles and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like those far ants I found in my bed.
Cut from the best cloth like a plaid flannel shirt,
You spark up my life more than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack,
My life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack.
Yore complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'.
Despite all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie with a RC cold drank,
We go together like a skunk goes with stank.
Some men, they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart, it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses on that special day
From the cooler at Kroger. That's impressive," I say.
Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever," they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey, these won't do.
Cause yor'e too special, you sweet thang you.
I got you a gift, without taste nor odor,
More useful than diamonds......IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!

lakritze
09-21-2003, 03:22 PM
Yaahoo that was prudy.I shor like to bring ma specul wife-sister-cousin-daughter to the out doors tables at the local pork 'n beer and listen to them wonderin banjo players or give her a dime fer the jute box.How romanteek.

Eros
10-16-2003, 11:01 PM
Hukt ahn foniks werkt fur me!!

cowgirltease
10-16-2003, 11:07 PM
Dayuuuum sounds like someone I know!!!!!! LMAO:p :D

LixyChick
10-17-2003, 06:12 AM
*sniffle*

*Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa*

I'm a sucker for potetree!

db........may I have a tissue? *sniffle*

babybunny
10-17-2003, 09:33 AM
:rolleyes: Omg! I know places where these kind of people live!

Oldfart
10-17-2003, 12:44 PM
Ah, the sound of oral music.

Bill Shakespeare's spewing 'cos he didn't write that one.

More?

Irish
10-17-2003, 12:59 PM
BigBear57---I hope that you don't mind,but I just copied your poem & sent it(via e-mail)to my wife at work.We have been exchanging Redneck things for years.Those & Blonde Jokes.I'm
Blonde & both of our daughters are!You could say that it's sort of
a tradition! Irish

dicksbro
10-17-2003, 02:14 PM
Hot damn! I taint hurd nuttin so nice since dey tuk da Beverin' Hillbillies off de picky tube. Big bar, ya dun good.

LixyChick
10-17-2003, 04:24 PM
Um.....db? About these tissues you lent me? Um.......they seem to be ABCO tissues hun! Got a fresher one? Like......one straight outta the box please??????

LMAO!

*hugs*

























ABCO=Already Been Cum On















*runs outta the thread*

dicksbro
10-17-2003, 04:49 PM
Shuky durn, Miss Lixy. I juz din wanna be wastin' da ol' ones. Specy since dem had senmenal valu frum when I wuz lookin at your piczies. :lust:

Yu hav sum newins right here, mamm! ;)

BigBear57
10-17-2003, 05:01 PM
Azaleas is pank and
Daisies is yeller
Y'all done brung a smile
to this here feller
roses smell purty and
the outhouse is stanky
I writ this here pome
so I could say thanky

Teddy Bear
10-17-2003, 07:32 PM
The original one you posted at the start is great!! I needed a good laugh.

But BigBear the little 'thanky' note you wrote is even better!! I love it. roflmao

Thanks for both of them.
teddy :D

txgrneyes
10-19-2003, 07:50 PM
LORD,HELP THESE PEOPLE....


;)

dicksbro
10-19-2003, 09:57 PM
LOL@txgrneyes. Thanks for the good wishes. :D :D