What to consider before doing the 3-some thing?

[CuriousMICouple]

The wife (of 13 years) and I are considering trying a 3-some. Two 3-somes actually. One with another guy, and one with another girl.

For those couples (married or long-term relationship) that have been there, done that, we'd like to ask what issues (if any) were caused AFTER the events took place? Was jealousy an issue? I assume you spent a lot of time talking ahead of time.

We want to try it (both of 'em) but we also know of many horror stories about 3-somes. We don't want to be one of them!

For the record, we've got great open lines of communication between us.

Thanks!

[divot109]

I'm not directly answering your question because I have never had a threesome or moresome during a comitted relationship. I have had 2 threesomes and a moresome, but never in a truly comitted relationship. Yes, you MUST maintain an open line of communication with your S/O...for me, I will openly say that I am a hipocrit when the thought of this comes up. With my wife (soon to be ex-wife), I would have loved to participate in a threesome just so long as the third party was a female, but I knew that I would NOT be prepared to watch her with another guy...PERIOD!!! It was a moot point, however, as she would never consider a threesome as an option in our sex life. Good luck and let us know what ensues, if anything!!!

[gibson]

I was involved in a FMF threesome once where I was friends with each of the ladies, but neither of the ladies knew eachother. I knew they each were contemplating a fantasy 3-threesome...mainly an avenue to experience a bi-sexual event. Of course after some wine, we were all winners. However, this can put some stress on a frienship. Both ladies were in their late 40s and married. I was single. Also, something else to think of beforehand is that you most likely fanstasize about your wife having sex with another woman as well as you in a FMF. In a MFM she may want the same from you. So, are you willing to experiment with that. I mean, I guess fair is fair..... Just something to chew on. Just curious, are you and you wife in your 40s?

[CuriousMICouple]

Just curious, are you and you wife in your 40s?

Nope, she is 37 and I'm 34.

[Wildeye]

This has been discussed before.

Communication is crucial.

You need to agree ground rules and honestly discuss what you want and how it will make you feel EG imagine your so kissing another guy, sucking his cock?, swallowing his cum?

Will this freak you out? make you jealous? angry? sad?

and how will she handle seeing your cock in another woman's mouth?

Carefully work out if this is a fantasy or something you both want?

But be warned, experience has told me that one person will be left-out at some point.

Wildeye

[jay_ba]

I've done the MFM thing quite a few times in a committed relationship, but only done the FMF thing a few times. most women are not all that comfortable with it, aside from fantasy.

I'm not the jealous type, so as long as it's understood that sex is just sex and love is something else, then I'm OK with either type of threesome. Mind you, I have never seen a woman have as many orgasms in one session as with a MFM. With two of us, we can just keep swapping spots if one gets tired or too close to cumming.