Ah ha! So that's where mine went to. :D

I'm going to give up sex and become a nun.

well, i've never had sex

These pix peeps send me make me wanna barf!

no one ever sends me anything of interest

My afternoon was a huge waste of time.

The sun was out and I cut the grass.

There's a party at my house tonight.

I have a party at my house every night.

I never enjoy being alone.

My parties usually get so rowdy the neighbors bring in the police.

I party with the police.

I have the police chief in my pocket, so to speak.

I'm thinking about getting a sex change.

I'm starting a fund raiser for Tess's sex change.

I want to be Superman!

I want to be faster than a speeding bullet.

I wouldn't want x-ray vision.

i taught jenna jameson everything she knows

i live at the crabby pattie

I was John Holmes' stand-in for the close-ups.

I work for the CIA.

I'm the Headmaster of an exclusive girls' school and have several students who are working on special projects so they don't flunk out.

I love it when the rain we need goes north or south of us.

I prefer weekends alone

I'm wearing a pink dress.

I do not fancy the pants off Mel Gibson

juicy is not wet and willing.

I am not dreading the evening ahead.

I just ate an entire turkey.

I am not thinking about that email I just got.

I am not thinking about sending someone an email

i am immortal

I died yesterday.

I am not happy right now!

I am such a good cook I might become a world class chef.

i am not lmao right now.

I do not see the humor in that ^^

bare4you is typing while blindfolded.

I can always think of something to say that is funny.