Who in the fuck does doggy style the first time they have sex? Or gets "down and dirty"? Most women want their first experience to be a special and loving experience, and while I'm a big fan of doggy style it's not exactly the most intimate or loving position there is.

Jude I was only saying that for those who just want to get on with it. I did state that if it's not for them to try missionary. We have all been in that situation where we just want to get on with it. Male and female. When you are horny you just want to get on with it.

In the ideal situation of course a girl wants to make sure it's a memorable time, but there are many types of "memorable" from person to person. We are all individuals and so what may be good for one person may or may not be good for other's.

good "technique"
 

If I may make a suggestion (as a longtime lurker and new member): I've found the key (for me as a male) is to pay attention to my lover and relax. The more attention I pay to my lover (in this case, my wife), the better my performance. Likewise, the less uptight I am about looking/feeling like a porn star, the better.

So here's what you need to know about sex (in real life): It's not about you. Sure, you can have a heck of a good time and the experience could feel fantastic, but sex done right (IMHO) is not about secret positions that work for any woman or "techniques" that never fail. There are no such positions and no such techniques. Every woman is wonderfully different.

Take it easy and get to know your woman. Find those little spots that drive her crazy? Discover how (and if) she likes to be spoken to during sex. Learn her natural inclinations and fantasies. It takes a little time to get to know each new partner, but it's well worth it. Why? Because what ultimately makes you a stud in bed is your ability to please your lover! And pleasing your (female) lover is about patience, listening, and sensitivity to her desires more than it is about having a secret knowledge of "all the best techniques and positions." All the techniques in the world won't make you a good lover if you don't know how your woman likes them to be used... ;)

Excellent advice!

I think I have a new crush!!!!!

Great advice jonik and welcome to Pixies!

i agree. i'm sensing a theme in this thread. :D

and welcome jonik!!!

(gushes)
 

You all are too kind.
We'll see if you think so highly of me after I submit my first story... :eek:

But seriously, don't you think that's right? It took me a few years to figure that stuff out, and here I am just giving it out for free... I should write a book. :D

Loulabelle, your first post really sums it all up. I've noticed from reading your posts that you have a knack of getting to the heart of the matter.

Aw, thank-you mabelode!

*blushes*

I put it down to the fact that I take a bath every morning, not a shower....it allows for much more thinking time...s'where I have most of my Eureka! moments. :)

I don't think there is any one thing you need to know, other than that you can trust your partner and that in some way they love you and won't be critical if you make a mistake =) But then again I guess that doesn't work so well with one night stands... hmmm...

the clit is not some mythological land

a guy is often sensitive down there after he cums

foreplay is important and can start with simply talking...doesn't always have to be physical

communication is key, don't be afraid to say what feels good when it does or ask questions (in sexy ways)....don't be afraid to talk about stuff outside sex either and be open about fantasies (no matter how kinky they are, so don't judge eachother...accept).

We all share the same basic places that turn us on, but sometimes some people are more sensitive in certain places, or more or less sensitive in those places than other people. Make sure you know what areas really turn eachother on or what areas u have to be careful with. An example is I know some girls who love their nipples played with roughly and then some who if I nibble at all it hurts them...it really depends on the person.