Feel like 5 gallons of shit in a 1 gallon bucket

Slick as owl shit....

I know, it's gross and my ex husband said it..go figure! lmao

Dont piss down my neck and tell me its raining !!!

As fast as shit through a raped goose

slow as molasses in January

he/she is about as bright as a one watt light bulb

his/her elevator dont quite go to the top

Feel like hammered shit.

A few normal run of the mill ones:

A Mcnugget short of a happy meal.

a sandwich short of a picnic.

The lights on but nobodys in>

The lift doesn't go to the top floor.

Theres a nutter !!!!

I don't think there are any branches in his/her family tree.

he/she fell outta the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.

Looks like he/she has been beat with an ugly stick.

Looks like he/she was in a rake fight and lost.

Busy as a one-armed paper hanger

Hoppin' like a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest

A dumbass bomb went off in here & left no survivors