FP, you may be in trouble with our blond Pixies ... but the jokes were cute. LOL :D :D

#1240

#1241 - ahhh don't worry I have a little something ready just incase any of our GORGEOUS blond ladies don't like the jokes ;)

#1242 - and with that said time for MORE jokes !!!!

Q: A blond going to London on a plane, how can you steal her window seat?
A: Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row.
Q: Why are blondes like pianos?
A: When they aren't upright, they're grand.
Q: Why are blondes so easy to get into bed?
A: Who cares?
Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
A: Run like Hell....she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
Q: What do you call a blonde golfer with an IQ of 125?
A: a foursome.
Q: What do you call a blond mother-in-law?
A: An air bag.
Q: Why do Blondes wear earmuffs?
A: To avoid the draft.
Q: What's the mating call of the blonde?
A: "I'm *sooo* drunk!"
Q: What is the mating call of the ugly blonde?
A: (Screaming) "I said: I'm drunk!"
Q: What's the mating call of the brunette?
A1: "All the blondes have gone home!"
A2: Has that blonde gone yet?

1243 - checking in before going off to work...

1244~Wow--lots of posts while I was gone. Took me 20 minutes to read through all the new ones! :)

1245~Had a karaoke first over the weekend. Finally got up enough nerve to sing the Divinyls' "I Touch Myself." Woohoo! :D :p :D

1246~Old asphalt roofing can be recycled for use as roadbed material.

1247~A round-top cloud with flattened base [cumulus] carries rainfall in its face.

1248~ In the Great Tri-State Tornado, which hit Missouri, Illinois, and Indiana in 1925, Joe Boston, a policeman in Murphysboro, Illinois, lost a bond for a deed that had been locked inside a safe in his home. The bond was sucked out of the safe and transported to the town of Lawrenceville, 125 miles northeast of Murphysboro. There it was found and returned to Boston by mail. About the same time, 130 miles away from Murphysboro in Robinson, one lucky farmer watched a $10 and a $20 bill drop right out of the sky, along with other articles that the tornado had swiped from Murphysboro.

1249~When Elvis was two years old, reportedly, a tornado swept through his hometown of Tupelo, Mississippi, on April 5, 1936. The storm was devastating, destroying homes across the street from the Presleys', but they escaped unscathed. They say a Tupelo kitchen was blown, intact, to the town of Mooresville, seven miles away, and that the tornado sucked the feathers off Tupelo chickens. Tupelo lost 235 people in that tornado.

1250~Today in History:

1969 Jodie Foster's debut

Six-year-old Jodie Foster makes her show business debut, on TV show Mayberry R.F.D. Foster grew up to become one of Hollywood's most respected actresses. She won Oscars for her roles in The Accused (1988) and The Silence of the Lambs (1991).

1251~Also Today in History:

1536
Anne Boleyn, the second wife of King Henry VIII, was beheaded.

1921
Congress passed the Emergency Quota Act, establishing national quotas for immigrants.

1928
The first annual Calaveras County "Frog Jumping Jubilee" was held in Angel's Camp, California.

1935
British author and soldier, T. E. Lawrence, also known as "Lawrence of Arabia," died from injuries sustained in a motorcycle crash.

1994
Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis died in New York.

1252~ And..

Today's Weather Fact...

On this date in 1975, thunderstorms produced wind gusts of up to 110 mph and golf-ball-size hailstones in Minnesota. An estimated 50 people were injured and 50 mobile homes were completely wrecked.

1253 It's been raining in London this morning but now the sun is shining. This is a pathetic post but at least I'm not leaving the Songbird to do all the work.

1254~

Top Nationalities of Travelers to the U.S.

Rank-Country of residence-2000 Total

1. Canada 14,594,000
2. Mexico 10,322,000
3. Japan 5,061,377
4. United Kingdom 4,703,008
5. Germany 1,786,045
6. France 1,087,087
7. Brazil 737,245
8. South Korea 661,844
9. Italy 612,357
10. Venezuela 576,663

1255~Thanks, GusAspar. Good morning/afternoon to you! :)

#1256 - Quote

"The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C,' the idea must be feasible."
- A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith's paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service. (Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.)

#1257 - More Quotes

"Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible."
- Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.

#1258 forgot what I was gonna say now

#1259

"Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then."~Katharine Hepburn

#1260 - Did it start with "Nice pics ladies..." and end with "ooooo I'm cumming!!!!!" ? oh no wait that was me not so long ago hehehe

#1261

Opium is derived from the opium poppy.

#1262~Mount Whitney is the highest mountain in the 48 contiguous states.

#1263~The U.S. is the largest importer of cognac.

#1264~The Monty Python movie "Life of Brian" was banned in Scotland.

#1265~Dennis the Menace's favorite drink is root beer.

#1266~Tournament golfers are penalized two strokes for slow play.

#1267 - oooo
It was banned all over for a while and I *think* it still is banned in Ireland...damn good film !!

#1268~Three-quarters of the world's pineapples are grown in Hawaii.

#1269~John F. Kennedy attended the London School of Economics.

#1270~Barnacles are animals.

#1271~Gravity provides the power in a soap box derby.

#1272~ The "C" in chain-store fonder J.C. Penney's name stood for "cash."

#1273 - Interesting fact....

I have only 2 obvious chest hairs (well they are obvious if you're within an inch of me).....they have have names..... Bob and Bob too :D

#1274

Oh, how funny! I have two obvious things on my chest, too, Fussy, but I haven't named them yet. :evil:

#1275~Theodore Roosevelt was nicknamed "The Cowboy President."

#1276~There are seven stars in the Big Dipper.

#1277~The name of the first nuclear-powered aircraft carrier was the Enterprise.

#1278 - ooooooooooooooo yummy ! :bite: :bite:

#1279~LOL @FussyPucker!