Unfortunately not you damn it!!!!

I agree entirely Irish: mutual respect IS the key. And the fact that you have not kept the existence of Pixies from your SO is an example of that mutual respect. You respect her enough not to keep things from her, and she respects your privacy and your choices enough not to have a problem with you coming here.

I'm not suggesting that people should tell everyone exactly what they say and do here at Pixies, but it saddens me that a number of people here say 'My SO isn't into this stuff' without actually giving them the opportunity to a) find out if that's the case and b) speak for themselves.

I suppose I just have this vision in my head of lots of people here at Pixies wishing that their SOs were more like Pixie-people (more open etc) while their SOs are suffering in silence, perhaps even visiting another similar site, wishing the same thing. And the reason I feel like this, is that I've been in that situation myself.

In the past I've made the mistake of hiding my true sexuality from my partner and he's hidden his from me.......it was symptomatic of a lack of trust and communication in our relationship, and I strongly believe that if one of us had taken that leap of faith first, things may not have ended the way they did. Of course, I don't regret the end of the relationship, but I do regret the fact that it was fear that held us both back. It's not a situation I intend to get into again.