Duct tape to hold it together and WD40 if you don't want it to work.


Basketball backboard

Hammer...if it's already broken, take it the rest of the way down.

Jammed zipper

Definately WD40



Printer

Duct tape ... so the darn cord doesn't keep coming unplugged. :)

Door frozen shut.

A combination of hammer and WD40.



Bicycle

WD40 to keep the chain lubricated.

Broken flower pot.

Duct tape. sometimes, the answer is obvious.

Cracked asphalt in the driveway.

I would go with duct tape


Computer

Hammer is most satisfying.



Vacuum cleaner

Duct tape and if still messed up hammer.


Football

WD-40. Watch the players go crazy! :rofl:



Books

Duct tape.


Bumper of car

Duct tape


Stuck zipper on a torn pair of jeans.

Lot's of WD-40. Not only may it unstick the zipper, it'll give a nice impersonation of a "wet spot."

DB forgot to post a problem, so I'll offer one:

late-running buses.