live in or married first
 

whcih do you guys think is better?

living together before marriage or getting married first? opinions and comments please...

Cant comment on the getting married first lol...My partner and myself have been living in sin for over 18 yrs

I got engaged to my ex before we lived together, which in hindsight was a mistake. You can't make a commitment like that until you know what married life is going to be like.

Fussy and I lived together before the question of marriage was even thought of, and it's worked out much better for us. Not only do we love and respect each other, but we can also live together without driving each other crazy. You know you're truly in love when you still want to marry/ be with someone after living with them for years first.

I have to agree with Lou on this. It's better to live with your partner before getting married. It's just much easier if things go sour and you part ways. Less entanglements in the end. My current partner and I are living together and we drive each other nuts all the time, but it's going really well and it couldn't be better.

For my wife and I, it was marriage after three years of dating. We never "lived together first."

Our marriage has been the time for us to really learn about each other and the result, for us, has been to appreciate each other more I think. Just worked out well for us. I know, I wouldn't trade her for the world.

It is shattering to have to back out of a basically flawed marriage.

A couple of months of sin could have saved friends of mine years of heartache.

I belive in marriage first and not "try before you buy", i think if the dating is not short by that i mean less than a year then you should think about marriage, i also belive the commitment to each other is not the same when you live together as you dont have that barrier that marriage puts up and you can just leave when you want

It depends on one's life experiences and beliefs whether or not you should live together prior to marriage, but I think the only true way to get to know eachother is by living with them first.......I lived with someone for eight years and that didn't work out in the end.....but without a marriage license, there was no costly dragged out divorce either which was a blessing in itself.

Remember love is blind and marriage is an eye opener!

Like others have said, it all depends. I never spent one night with my now husband before we were married and we dated for 7 years, granted we started dating when I was 16....but still. I knew if I moved in with him, we'd probably never marry. We've now been married almost 10 years.

I lived with my (now-husband) for about 5 years (out of a cumulative 10 we dated) and the living together gave me a LOT more confidence that we're compatible. I'm not the easiest person to live with, and I needed to know that we'd get along.

Besides which, marriage should be about two people who WANT to be together, not who are trapped together...what better way to determine if you WANT to be with someone than to live with them for a while?

I like the idea of "test driving" before you commit. if i wouldn't have done that with my ex, with as much as we tried and failed, we would have been married twice and divorced twice.

If i had the choice, Mayhem would be living with me now while we make our wedding plans, or I be living with him. Unfortunately, half a continent and an ocean separates us, so living together isn't an option.

I say, do what your's and your partner's hearts feel is right for you

I was married to someone else before Mr. Lixy and we lived together first (6 years) and that didn't work out. So, I doubled the living together time with Mr. Lixy to 12 years and then we married and it's been a wonderful relationship...both before marriage and after.

In my personal opinion I would NEVER marry before living with someone. It wouldn't be fair to him or myself.

To know me is to see me in the morning with bed head...to see me puke after a night of partying...to hear me scream obscenities as I "cook" in the kitchen...to get me a hot water bottle when the monthly cramps grip me so I can't walk...to watch me clean when you think the house is already clean but I insist that it's dirty and you just can't see the dirt...to watch me leave your dirty work socks inside out when I wash them because I've told you time and again I will not turn those stinky, icky things...etc. I think you get the picture!

But that's ^^^ just me!

Interesting....not having a go at ya beliefs hun.....but

Being married does not stop people leaving when they want to....getting divorced is easy now days (many many do it)...and in my case i am very very committed to Bilbo....he is my soulmate...while i dont actually have the piece of paper...most class us as married and are suprised that we are not *LOL*

If we separate...it would be no different to a married couple...it would be costly and more than likely dragged out....Everything we own was bought while we were together and as such would need to be either sold or divied up...We also have kids which makes it even more messy

So please before ya say that defacto people aren't committed just pause for a sec

Of course it's worth remembering, that not every country is as up-to-date in terms of marriage/ co-habitation as Australia.

In Britain, unmarried couples have far fewer rights when it comes to inheritance laws, dividing of assets if the relationship breaks down and until yesterday, adopting of children. One way or another, in Britain, if you know it's for good, it makes more sense to be married. Outmoded, for sure, but true.

Yes very true Loulabelle...i didnt realise that for British people

Moose is an Aussie thats why i addressed his post the way i did

Regardless of relationship laws in whatever country....it is up to the couple concerned to decide if marriage is for them....for others to assume they are not committed due to a piece of paper is not right as far as i'm concerned

I've seen many a married couple have absolutely no respect for the vows they took...and just as many as defacto couples

Marriage with a prenup agreement....is that a no committment excuse? Just curious