Woke up this morning Put on my slippers
Walked in the kitchen and died
And oh what a feeling!
When my soul Went thru the ceiling
And on up into heaven I did ride
When I got there they did say
John, it happened this way
You slipped upon the floor And hit your head
And all the angels say Just before you passed away
These were the very last words That you said:

Please don't bury me Down in that cold cold ground
No, I'd druther have 'em cut me up And pass me all around
Throw my brain in a hurricane And the blind can have my eyes
And the deaf can take both of my ears If they don't mind the size

Give my stomach to Milwaukee If they run out of beer
Put my socks in a cedar box Just get 'em out of here
Venus de Milo can have my arms Look out! I've got your nose
Sell my heart to the junkman And give my love to Rose

Give my feet to the footloose Careless, fancy free
Give my knees to the needy Don't pull that stuff on me
Hand me down my walking cane It's a sin to tell a lie
Send my mouth way down south And kiss my ass goodbye

__________________
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