"...it says it sells Pest Trap, Malware Wipe, Spy Guard, but I suspect that's all just a ruse to get your credit card, & these so-called programs probably dont exist..."

Scotz...don't reformat!!!....this is the same garbage I found on my son's computer!!!...It can be beat!...use Spybot S&D in SAFE MODE....it will remove 90% of this spyware and prompt you to let spybot run after restart....let it run again....and continue until ALL of the crap is gone
Be patient ...it will do the job...just give it a chance.I had to run Spybot S&D in safe mode...then restarted and ran it in full modetwice and finally safe mode once again......the spyware will attempt to block the Spybot from running on restart but eventually it is eliminated.
..p.s.--make sure your definitions are up to date as this piece of shit is fairly new.....
Good Luck!!