It was a long time ago; I know better now, but was a dumbass then. Let me rephrase... I was a bigger dumbass then than I am now!

An ex and I were drinking beer and fooling around. He gave me some great oral, but I got a very nasty yeast infection from the beer he was drinking.

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Dear Lord, I pray for wisdom to understand my man, love to forgive him, and patience for his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN


It's no trick loving somebody at their best. Love is loving them at their worst.
~Tom Stoppard~


It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.
~George Burns~


As bad as I am, I'm proud of the fact that I'm worse than I seem.
~A. DiFranco~