Big Bear... You're right, it's awful to have to watch someone who seemingly is not dealing with an issue such as this. It makes you feel completely helpless and impotent. I think the ladies who have posted ahead of me were all right on the mark... all you can do for her is to not let her hide from you, and be as supportive as you can. Keep offering to help her, offer suggestions as to what you would be willing to do as her friend to help her out. Let her know you won't abandon her. And whatever you do, don't do anything to get yourself thrown into jail! He most certainly WILL take it out on her if you confront him physically.

I think tho, that it's also very important for you to come to some kind of terms within yourself. Of course, one can never "feel ok" about someone else who is suffering needlessly, but you have to be careful that it doesn't chip more away from you than it must. I have learned, painfully and frustratingly, that despite the best and most caring efforts of friends... you can not force anyone to accept your help. You can just be there if and when they're ready to allow you to reach out to them.

Best of luck to you... and to her.

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Dear Lord, I pray for wisdom to understand my man, love to forgive him, and patience for his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN


It's no trick loving somebody at their best. Love is loving them at their worst.
~Tom Stoppard~


It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.
~George Burns~


As bad as I am, I'm proud of the fact that I'm worse than I seem.
~A. DiFranco~