03-15-2005, 06:10 PM
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~a little bit naughty~
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Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Georgia
Posts: 23,422
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You clean it with WD-40 and reupholster with duct tape.
Cable went out and you have no reception.
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03-15-2005, 11:02 PM
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Lost without a compass.
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Nowhere special
Posts: 5,888
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well after you've thrown the hammer through the TV and fixed that with the duct tape. then you WD-40 the cable-end Connectors.
The Webcam wire is loose and it won't stay in one spot on the desk without sliding
__________________
hungry? why wait.....eat me.
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03-18-2005, 03:28 AM
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Truckin' up
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Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Hot Springs, AR
Posts: 407
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Duct tape that pesky cable exactly where you want it.
A spouse/SO who constantly leaves lights on in every room of the house.
__________________
If the cops didn't see it, I didn't do it!
Old age and treachery WILL overcome youth and enthusiasm.
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03-25-2005, 12:28 AM
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Lost without a compass.
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Nowhere special
Posts: 5,888
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hit them in the head with the hammer until they understand!
its time to fix that rickety step
__________________
hungry? why wait.....eat me.
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04-17-2005, 09:11 AM
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Loungin' Around
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: West Coast
Posts: 30,587
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Use the hammer to pund the step in, and then spread the step in WD-40 so anyone who complains about the squeaky step....won't be around long. 
Out of coffee filters in the mornign?
__________________
Life is too short not to love and be loved....preferably multiple times in one night.
I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them. ~ Jay McInerney
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04-17-2005, 12:24 PM
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Just me.
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: West central Illinois
Posts: 590,002
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Use the claw end of the hammer to first put small holes in strips of duct tape which can be laid side by side to serve as the filter. Note, the hammer can also be used to quiet any complaints about the odd grounds that sneak through the holes. The WD-40 can be used to lubricate the floor making body disposal easier. 
The ash tray is full. |
04-17-2005, 04:12 PM
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Libidinous Hussy Member
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Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 1,002
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Duct Tape...just sticky it all out until it's clean
Your boyfriend forgot to call (grrrrrrrrrr.....)
__________________
Thank you, sir, may I have another?
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04-17-2005, 08:59 PM
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~Imaginary lover~
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Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 9,432
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Tape his mouth shut with duct tape so the neighbors won't hear his screams when I whip his ass with the hammer handle.
Your lawnmower deck is broke and keeps falling down.
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I am here for only a short time on this earth. My goal is to make everyone I see smile if only for a moment.
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04-17-2005, 09:24 PM
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gurly gurl
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Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Reality
Posts: 33,683
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hammer to be sure to break it real good to buy a new one
Your head board squeeks
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~Tainted Love~
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04-18-2005, 08:00 PM
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Lost without a compass.
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Nowhere special
Posts: 5,888
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cover it with 3 layers of duct tape.....it may not stop the squeeking but it will give some padding for other things ......if it still bothers have sex on the couch
that damn cd player isn't working properly....skipping and not always closing.
__________________
hungry? why wait.....eat me.
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12-06-2010, 06:41 AM
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Just me.
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: West central Illinois
Posts: 590,002
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Hammer ... beat it to death and get a new one.
Flat tire
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12-06-2010, 04:31 PM
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Pixie's Resident Reptile
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Central MD, USA
Posts: 21,196
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WD-40. You need it to loosen the lug nuts so you can swap in the spare.
Pesky ex.
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On the kinkometer, my kink measures as a sine wave.
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12-06-2010, 08:40 PM
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Pretty 'n Pink
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: At the bottom of the great big Vegemite jar
Posts: 12,199
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Duct tape to shut him up and if that doesn't work use the hammer.
Broken Coffee cup?
__________________
Can I drink your bath water can I have your smelly underwear
I just wanna hold it smell it throw it in the air
Can you hold me tight and whisper dirty little nothings when I come
Just don't keep me hanging I've been hanging much too long
Espen Lind ~ Baby You're So Cool
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12-07-2010, 05:26 AM
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Just me.
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: West central Illinois
Posts: 590,002
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Duct tape is the obvious answer, although a case could be made for the hammer if your goal was to eliminate the evidence.
Mice?
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12-07-2010, 02:20 PM
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Pixie's Resident Reptile
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Central MD, USA
Posts: 21,196
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Calls for the hammer. No compromise.
Drafty fireplace.
__________________
On the kinkometer, my kink measures as a sine wave.
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